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Olayinka Oyetunji: Your Dreams Get Fulfilled in Trying to Help Others

Dear Woman, The Gift You Have is a Big Deal

Women's Devotional  1Timothy 4:14 "Do not neglect the gift you have..." A young woman who had not had a meal from the previous day because of some of her financial difficulties found some metal scraps at her backyard and threw it out.  While she did, she met the inquisitive gaze of a passerby. A few minutes later, she came back to get something outside her compound and found that the passerby and a metal scraps buyer were haggling over the price of the metal scraps she had just thrown away. The price for which the metal scraps were sold left her mouth hanging wide open. She couldn't believe that she hadn't had a meal from the previous day because of a lack of cash and she had a solution all along but couldn't see it.  Like the woman in this story, how often do we commonise what we have--our gifts and innate abilities. We look at the things that we have and treat them like the metal scraps--we throw them away! And our lives are no better for it. We want somethi

Is Sex Negotiable? Answers From Six Couples

Sex in marriage is essential in building intimacy between couples. However, research has shown that men by nature have a very high sex drive compared to their female counterpart.  Studies also reveal that low sex drive in women may instigate women to place a bargain before engaging in sexual activities with their partners.  Couple therapists and marriage counsellors have rated sexual problems amongst couples as the leading cause of divorce. Different factors may be responsible for low sex drive in women. Poor nutrition, hormonal changes during her monthly cycle, hormonal imbalance, work and life stress, low self esteem,past experiences related to sexual abuse or physical violence are some to mention a few. In a local meetup organised by a faith based organisation, some couples were asked if sex in marriage is negotiable. Six couples share their personal experiences. Couple 1 Husband:Whenever my wife gives me a condition by which she can allow me get intimate with her,it pisse

Changing the Way You Think Can Impact Your Marriage Positively

Women's Devotional  "As a man thinketh so is he " Proverbs 23: 7. A personal finance expert recalled a certain time she visited the supermarket with her kids. On reaching a particular display counter, the kids were reaching out for their favorite expensive items. She wanted to say ‘hey we can’t afford these items now’. But she caught herself early having learnt not too long before the harmful effects of saying ‘we can’t’. She reconstructed the sentence and asked, ‘what can we do to afford these items?’ And that spurred lots of ideas and solutions to generate more income for her kids to purchase their favorite items. It’s a wonder to know that when you adjust the way you think, it can have a great effect on your response and action. The mind is a powerful tool. You can use it to drive your life and marriage  in the path of success.  You are what you are and have what you have because first you told yourself so and acted in the way that brought the things you have into

Six Ways to Tone Down Stress in your Life

It is not uncommon to see someone you know, perhaps your friend, a family member, or   colleague whose demeanor is looking unusual and you show concern by asking the question ‘why is your appearance looking dull today?’ or you   say   ‘you seem to have lost weight’ and their reply would be ‘it is stress o jare’ in Nigeria vernacular. The term stress seem to be something everyone takes for granted but its effect on our physical, emotional and mental well-being is often disastrous. More women than men are prone to stress partly because besides the everyday hustle to support the family income is the added responsibility of taking care of the home front. Many studies have confirmed that stress could lead to deli-bating diseases like high blood pressure (which is constantly on the rise in recent times), heart attack, nervous breakdown and many others. Hence, there is an urgent need for us to take the matter of stress very seriously. Here are six ways to manage stress be

How to Manage the Most Important Things in Your Life

Life is always busy. We are always chasing after our goals and dreams. The busyness that comes with everyday life may get us distracted that we may push the things that matter most to the back burner. In the midst of our very busy schedules, when we take time out to reflect and channel our focus to the most important things in our lives, life will be more fulfilling. Here, I share some thoughts on what I believe we should keep our eyes on regardless of our busy schedules. FOCUS ON ‘YOU’ Sometimes, it’s funny how we pay attention to everything else except ourselves especially as women. We are nurtures by nature and we always want to ensure everyone is all right and everything is OK. But, do we stop for one moment and check in on ourselves? You are first the most important thing. Your family, organization (whether self-employed or otherwise) and the society always have need for you. As such, if you do not take the time to take care of yourself as much as you do others, you ma